My Thoughts on the End of the World

As 2012 is hours away, I remember back 12 years ago when many people thought Y2K was the end of the world and all electronics would crash and burn, killing everyone. That was not the case. I think back to last May when that pastor predicted the apocalypse. Ironically, I still see those billboards up. And I think to the Mayan calendar that predicts the end of the world in a year from now.

But what if tonight really was the end of the world? Would I live today any different? This is a re-post from another blog I had that shares those thoughts. These are my thoughts on the end of the world.

(Originally posted May 20, 2011 here.) 
By now, I am sure that everyone has heard of the pastor in California who is convinced that the rapture will happen on May 21, 2011 and the world will end the following October. Because that date is so near, it was on my mind as with the rest of the nation (and maybe even world). Today as I spent most of my time in airplanes and airports, making my way to visit my mom, a great song came up on my iPod. I always thought of Bruce Cockburn's "Last Night of the World" as a love song expressing no regrets in life. Today it ironically had new meaning.

The chorus goes:
"If this were the last night of the world, what would I do?
What would I do that was different, unless it was champagne with you..."

From stories I have heard, people are taking this May 21 "prophesy" in different ways. I have heard of some who have sold everything they own, quit their jobs, and have gone on vacation. Others are planning post-rapture looting parties. So, I got myself thinking: if this really was "the last night of the world", would I change the way I live? And my answer in that honest moment of personal reflection took me off-guard.

Yes, I would. But not how I would have expected. When it comes to the issue of eternity and Heaven, I am 100 % certain that whenever the rapture happens (or I die, whichever comes first) that Jesus will usher me into Heaven with open arms where I will spend eternity worshiping the Lord. And I know it's nothing I have done that has earned (or could ever earn) my place there. Instead, it is everything Jesus has done in my place. He took all of my mistakes, short-comings, and everything else labeled 'sin' and died with them on the cross. Then three days later he conquered death so I could live free of the penalty of my sins. And he did all of this because he loved me so deeply that he wanted me to know God personally and intimately, both on earth and in Heaven. And all I had to do to save my place in Heaven was acknowledge what Jesus did and receive the life he offered me wen he rose from the grave. So I wouldn't change my actions to try and get into Heaven, because I already know I am going there. But this got me thinking about everyone who is not.

If I really knew that the rapture was going to happen tomorrow, I would want to tell people. There would suddenly be a sharp urgency to my words and to my ministry. But the reality is that I don't know. I can't know when it will happen. I only know that it will. In Matthew 24 it is written that we should always be prepared and we should always be ready. So why do I live my life with calm complacency? The stark reality is, whether or not Jesus comes back tomorrow,he is coming. And I am called to live my life with that expectancy and urgency.

So, if this was the last night of the world, I would do one thing different: I would tell you about Jesus. And it makes me wonder how different my entire life would be if I lived every day as the last night of the world...  
If this were the last night of the world, what would you do differently?

          “No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark; and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away. That is how it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.Two men will be in the field; one will be taken and the other left. Two women will be grinding with a hand mill; one will be taken and the other left.

         “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come. But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would not have let his house be broken into. So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him."

-Matthew 24:36-44 

The Birth of the Redeemer

Redeem: v. 1. to buy back; 2. to pay off; 3. to recover
Redeemer: n. 1. a person who redeems; 2. Jesus Christ
            (credit Dictionary.com)


As all the wrapping paper pieces settle and chaos gives way to silence, I sit and reflect on Christmas. Even before I decided to follow Jesus, I heard the Christmas story year in and year out. It seems to have lost its awe. It seems to have lost its wonder. A virgin teenager really gave birth to the Son of God in a smelly barn? Really?? And He came to not only save the nation of Israel, but the whole world?? Really??? This story is no longer new and wondrous, but old and stale. It is hard for me to remember the miracle that Christmas is all about. But it truly is miraculous that Christmas not only celebrates the birth of the Savior, but also the redemption of us all.

As I have been finding new reflections to freshen this Christmas season, I was surprised to find that the official definition of Redeemer is Jesus. Even secular, non-bias sources see Jesus Christ as not only a redeemer, but The Redeemer. So, I have found my fresh perspective on Christmas as I reflect on how I was redeemed. I am in awe of the ways Jesus has saved my life, saved those in my life, and blessed the road ahead. I am Redeemed because He is the Redeemer.

Thank you LORD for saving me, for redeeming me, for setting me free. Thank you for loving me so much that you paid the ultimate price to redeem my life from the ultimate bondage. And thank you for allowing me to spend your birthday celebration with those I love so dearly. Thank you LORD. I love you. 


*Looking for a fresh look at the Christmas story? Check out this cute video...

To All You Procrastinators...

Bought all your Christmas presents yet? For all you procrastinators out there, here's some good gift ideas for meaningful and unique Christmas presents...

Since when do babies need iPhones??

Doesn't this defeat the purpose of the cell phone??

Mmmmm... smells like bacon

You look like a handsome filet mingon in that scarf 

Getting hurt never looked so good!

Let there be (bacon) light! 

Flavored flossing!

Need a nap? Grab a tie!

There's nothing classier than wine out of a mason jar! 

Merry Christmas Shopping!

Pass It On

When I first got engaged, I was first elated, and then overwhelmed when I started to think of everything that needed to be done. Now, two months into it, Almost everything is either booked or has been purchased, and even though things are moving fast as May rapidly approaches, I feel like I am able to relax and enjoy the planning. 

I have a friend who just got engaged this weekend and is planning to be married in February. I am so excited for her! But as we were talking about it, I could see the look of fear and stress overtake her face. This is a time where she should be joyous and excited to take this new step in her life, but instead she is burdened by plans and stressed that she doesn't know what to do or where to even begin. Being slightly ahead of the planning process, I offered to help her. And within 20 minutes I was able to give her nearly 20 different links to dress rental shops, caterers, marriage license and name change info, reception venues, how to register with various stores, easy invitations, and upcoming bridal expos. Having been in her shoes, I know how helpful and essential this is. 

If it weren't for Jackie, Sharayah, and other recently wedded individuals, I would have been so bogged down and lost, that I would have been on the verge of a stress-induced coma. I am so grateful for their help in my planning process (and continuous help), and I am so grateful that I was able to pay that forward today. 

So, as as the world prepares to pause (hopefully) and celebrate Peace, let's stop and think about what others have done for us. What can you do to pass this kindness on to another? What can you do for a friend or stranger that they can pass it on to someone else? As we are in the midst of the season of giving, think about what things you can give. Because the best gifts are those that can't be returned, but passed on. 

Looking 3 Years Back and 150 Days Forward

Three years ago today I took a risk and began a journey with my best friend. I had no idea where it would end up, but I knew I had to take that risk of heartache and disappointment and find out.

For the months leading up to December 7, 2008, Josh did everything he could to convince me I should date him. But looking at the situation, I was hesitant and doubtful. He was a freshman just starting college, and I was senior about to graduate college. Where could this even go except an untimely death and heartbreak? It took months to even allow myself to have a crush on him. He was (and still is) an attractive and charming man of God. What's not to like about that? But I couldn't get over the fear of risking it all and ending up alone.

It was an act of God that convinced me to date Josh. I knew in my heart that even if he was one year older, I would have thrown myself at his feet. But because of my hesitancy, it forced me to rely on God and his leading in a way I had never done before. Through listening to a song (you can read more of that story by clicking here) I realized I had been guarding my heart too hard and wasn't letting anyone in. God was asking me what the worst outcome could be and when thinking about it that way, it wasn't so bad. Especially when comparing that to the best possible outcome.

So, I agreed to date him and the conversations that followed are quite indicative of our relationship. We both agreed that two things needed to happen before we could date: talking to our other best friend and talking to my dad. Josh is very traditional and wanted to ask my father's permission to date me. We had formed a little three Musketeers group, so we knew we also had to talk to Jackie, the third Musketeer. Josh was under the impression that once these things happen, we would be dating. I was under the impression that once these things happen, we would have another conversation to officially start dating. Well, you can imagine my surprise when I get a text asking, "So, we're legit now, right?" I was furious. Even though it lead to a mini-fight, it makes a great story now.

December 7, 2008: After a long, tearful, but amazing conversation.

But we ended up having a great first official date on December 7th. We bared our souls to each other and found forgiveness and acceptance like I never even knew was possible. And over the past three years it hasn't been easy; there have been times of heartache and times of doubt, but when those happened, it all came down to what I wanted. And I couldn't imagine my life without Josh. He was what I wanted.

So now, looking forward, I am excited for what lies ahead of us. In 150 days we will be husband and wife, and I look forward to having the rest of our lives to continue to learn about each other and grow with each other and get old with each other. And I know it won't all be wedded bliss, but I will be with my best friend forever, so to me, it will all be worth it.

I love you Joshua. Happy Three Years, and I look very much forward to being your wife in 150 days... but who's counting? ;)

Something Heavenly

I love my job. But like all things in life, it's hard. It was especially hard tonight to see one of my girls wrought by fear and pain from her past. After comforting her, I cried harder than I have in a while and my heart fissured into a million tiny pieces. It's not fair. How could anyone so young and beautiful and vibrant be so crippled by fear that they remain paralyzed? It's so easy to get annoyed and frustrated by their attitudes and actions, but there's nothing like a humble dose of reality to remind you why they have attitudes and why they act as they do. I am so filled with compassion and empathetic pain that my soul aches.

Tonight I have prayed and prayed and prayed. I pray that God's presence would fill this place and dispel all fear. I pray that these broken girls would grow and blossom into strong and courageous women. I pray that the Lord would fill them with His Spirit and it would transform them from the inside out. I pray for healing and love to abound. I pray for radical change in their hearts and in their lives. I pray for peace.

I was talking and crying to my roommate about how my heart literally ached and that I don't think I can pray hard enough or loud enough. I told her that, "I know God hears my prayers, I just don't know how powerful they are to move mountains, and with these girls, mountains need to be moved." To which she replied, "That's why He brought you to them. They can't move mountains on their own."

While processing this, these lyrics came on the radio:
"Whatever you're doing inside of me, it feels like chaos but I believe you're up to something bigger than me, larger than life, something Heavenly." 


My heart feels like chaos, but I know all of this is bigger than me. The girls, their stories, my story, working here, it's something heavenly. That brings comfort to my breaking heart tonight.